Surreal

Disclaimer: This is a long read.

Last weekend was surreal.

Especially since last week, I was a wreck. Hormones and obssessive behavior were warping my brain cells. It all boiled down to Thursday night: I told him that I felt that I was a very low priority for him. He defended himself saying that I didn't have time for him. That night, I was crying my eyes out, as Dar slept away from me, irritated by my weepy behavior.

Friday afternoon, I received a text message from Dar telling me he was going to pick me up. Judging from his cold behavior that morning (he didn't give me a good bye kiss when he left for work), I was amused, to say the least, to get that message. However, a monster headache was eating at my brains (due to my late night crying), and so I could only muster a civil "Hello" to him and his officemate when they picked me up. I mostly kept my eyes closed as we went home.

But then he suggested we watch Hitch. I really wanted to sleep off my headache but last night's argument came back to me. I wanted to prove to him that I had all the time in the world for him, even though my headache was pounding hammers inside my head! I told him to pass by Mercury Drug to buy Alaxan FR first.

And that was when the surreal weekend started.

We watched Hitch, as if we didn't argue, as if I didn't cry in my sleep, as if he didn't just brush off my loneliness last night.

Then as we went home, he mentioned that he needed to go to his shop tomorrow (Saturday) to pick up his money. My heart gave a little jump, as I calmly told him that I wanted to go to the Wedding Expo tomorrow, and to Balay Kalinaw, to check out the place and the stairs that was concerning him [his brother moves around in a wheelchair]. He said that we'll do all that tomorrow afternoon, then go to his shop, then have dinner at the bulalo-han place he told me about. I wholeheartedly agreed.

And so we spent Saturday afternoon together, with Darice. We went to Balay Kalinaw, in U.P., to look at those stairs. He said either his brother is carried or pulled up the stairs, or a temporary ramp is made. I could see he was willing to compromise, and that was the most important thing for me. Last Tuesday, when I told him the function room we rented at the Balay was situated at the second floor, the only thing he said was, "Alam mo namang hindi puede sa second floor diba? Maghanap na tayo ng iba." That reaction contributed to my Thursday night breakdown. Therefore, for him to find a way for us to continue with our Balay plans was really something else.

Then we made the rounds at the Wedding Expo, collecting brochures mostly from photographers and cake suppliers. He wasn't just there to accompany me, and to take care of Darice while I collect the brochures, but he was actually into it also! He also looked at the album samples, as we were *window-shopping* for a photographer. When we moved on to the cake suppliers, he was *shocked* to find out that only a layer or only a part of a layer of the cake was edible! He said he wanted the whole cake to be edible hahahah! I told him, "Sobrang impractical kaya non! Sinong kakain ng sandamakmak na cake?" He answered with a mischievous grin, "Yun lang pakain natin sa guests natin!". Hahahaha! When we passed by the Weddings@Work booth to look at the Unity Coins, he said "Okay to ah." He said he wanted the gold coins, but I preferred the silver ones. But since it was so rare for him to have an opinion regarding our wedding preparations, I was okay with the gold Unity Coins. [But we didn't get them yet, maybe a few months before the wedding]

We then went to his shop in Manila. He knows how uncomfortable I get with his friends so he really took care of me and Darice, and would not leave our side. Then we went to the bulalo-han place in Pasay [so far!] with his buddies, and we ate lots of bulalo and sisig (even Darice!). I really felt he was different that night because he was really attentive, not only to Darice, but to me as well.

We went home, and I was a bit saddened because I knew he was going to spend the rest of the night in front of the computer, playing Ragnarok (what else?). He wasn't able to play the rest of the day already, so surely, he'd want to play the rest of the night. But then, he totally surprised me with a "Nood tayo ng DVD ha pag-uwi."

Wow. Really blown away.

And so we watched Million Dollar Baby. We were both so affected by the movie, we opened the TV to look for something light and fun to watch. I settled for Return of the King on HBO. Legolas is always light and fun to watch hahahah :P

Lunchtime, the next day Sunday, he was itching to show me his basketball shooting moves for me to emulate for the 2-ball competition this Thursday. (Yes, that's right, I'm playing for our team on Thursday. Again.) I was procrastinating because I felt so un-sporty that day. But he insisted! He wanted to teach me! And so, we had an hour of shooting practice, with me learning to do "boarding" for a lay-up shot, jumping when trying to shoot the ball, and basically trying to get the ball near the ring during a foul-line shot. He said, "Sige, i-perfect mo yung lay-up mo, di tayo aalis dito hangga't di natatanggal braso mo!"

After that exercise, we went to Sta. Lucia to get our hair cut. He loves going to Les Pappu because the "barber" there gets the cut right all the time. I got my long bangs shortened, so they really look like bangs right now. I was kind of uncomfortable with it, so I was always fixing it while we went around Sta. Lucia and when we got home. But then, as I was fixing my hair, for the nth time, he remarked, "Ang ganda mo, Shell." Awwwww.... it has been a long time since I heard that! Then he followed it up with this: "... Mukha kang koreana sa buhok mo!" Hahahahah! He really is so good with his words.

For some couples, a weekend with their significant other is just like any other weekend. For me, a weekend with my SO is so surreal, so unexpected, so out-of-this-world, because he usually doesn't choose to do things with me. You might find this a little weird because we already live together, but we really just do different things at the same time, and that's not the same as spending time together, or with each other. This has given me much frustration, because, goddamit, we already live together, why the hell do I feel like I still don't get to be with him???

The weekend was different because we were together, doing these activities with each other. Most of the time, somebody just spaces out, and doesn't make any effort to enjoy the *togetherness* (I admit I'm guilty of this too). Last weekend, we set time for each other, and really made effort to enjoy that time we had together. It's so good to write *we*... it really is soooo long since we did anything together.

And so I hope a weekend like this will not be surreal anymore. I hope we can keep this up. I'm not asking for a totally *wow* experience every weekend, but I do hope I get to spend quality time with my SO every weekend (a 10-minute hug will do ^_^).

And it will not be surreal anymore, it will just be real, a weekly thing I will always look forward to.